SALT LAKE CITY: A 59-year-old Utah man who wrote his own obituary before he died used the opportunity to come clean. Friends and family of Val Patterson learned last Sunday that the man they thought held a doctorate from the University of Utah received the degree thanks to a paperwork mistake and that he never even graduated.
Patterson died from throat cancer on July 10. He wrote his own death notice in the first person last fall.
The light-hearted obituary published in the Salt Lake Tribune also includes a confession to stealing a business’ safe. He wrote: “As it turns out, I am the guy who stole the safe from the Motor View Drive Inn back in June, 1971.”
His widow, Mary Jane, said the confessions are true.
attorney convicted in ear licking case
LIHUE: A judge called a Hawaii attorney convicted of harassment a ‘dirty old man’ for licking a client’s ear. After a bench trial, Kauai Attorney Lawrence McCreery, 64, was found guilty of harassment after a former client testified that while discussing her child custody case last year, he licked the back of her right ear.
She said he told the 21-year-old woman while touching her arm, “You look so good,” and “Too bad you’re married,” according to the Kauai prosecuting attorney’s office. The woman said he made a weird sound and hugged her tightly right before the licking.
McCreery testified to deny he licked her. He claimed she initiated the hug.
Per Diem Fifth Circuit District Court Judge Frank Rothschild ruled there is no evidence the woman made up the story.
McCreery, who was licenced to practice law in Hawaii in 1975, was ordered to pay a USD 250 fine, prosecutors said.
“Quite frankly, these are the actions of a dirty old man,” Rothschild said.
Defense Attorney Michael Soong said he plans to appeal.